This feeling...

Well, what do i have to say? I feel horrible. But who blogs about how terrible they feel?
I do. I can't help but at least express how i feel today. It is not a good day so far. And My sweet little boy is sick 😞

I thought I hate hot days. Well I have come to find out that I don’t like long rainy days as well. And that is exactly what happened yesterday. It rained like it was not going to stop.  Times like those make me think of Noah days. That maybe, this is it!!!  The rain that will not stop.  So, I was cold, very cold and sick . Not good. Then I had to watch my 4 year old as he restlessly turned in bed because he doesn't feel good either.  Eishh… I  don’t like this feeling.  I guess I am entitled  to expression of discomfort  once in a while!

Who does not like good things? Not all that glitters is gold.

Well i learned a very big lesson while studying Genesis 13 this week. The story of Lot and Abraham separating.

Wealth seems to carry with it a lot of good and bad. that is exactly what happened with Lot and Abraham after they had each acquired great wealth. They could not live together peacefully. Quarrels erupted among their herds men. It was ugly!

Abraham being the man that he was, always looking out for the needs of others and loving harmony, called his Nephew Lot and they had a good chat to resolve this situation that was tearing them apart.

Abraham as recalled in Genesis 13:8-9 said to Lot,“Let’s not have any quarreling between you and me, or between your herders and mine, for we are close relatives.  Is not the whole land before you? Let’s part company. If you go to the left, I’ll go to the right; if you go to the right, I’ll go to the left.”

Imagine that!!! Keep in mind that Abraham was Lot's uncle, so all rights to choose first. And he was an elder, he was the reason they moved in the first place, he must have also remembered that God had promised him that land. But check him!!! telling Lot to pick where ever he wants to go. 

I sometimes picture myself in that situation. i would have possibly stamped my foot and said, " Hey, you Lot, look man, your herdsmen are very notorious. i can't have them messing around. do i need to remind you that you are here because of me. God gave me this land. it is mine. so , live here peacefully, or i will evict you and you look for some place else where. I am very disappointed in you !!! "

May be i wouldn't say that but i probably wouldn't be as humble as Abraham was.

So u can imagine what Lot felt upon hearing his uncle say that. He must have thought in his heart, "Okay, here is my chance now!!!"

The next verses tell us what his response was.

Vs 10 and 11 tell us, " Lot looked around and saw that the whole plain of the Jordan toward Zoar was well watered, like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt. (This was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.) So Lot chose for himself the whole plain of the Jordan and set out toward the east. The two men parted company......."

We are going to rewind a bit.... Lot looked around and saw the WHOLE plain of the Jordan .......well watered, like the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt (keeping in mind that they had been there previously and must have been taken up by all the splendor of Egypt!) Oooh my goodness... who doesn't want good things????

Upon seeing these things what did he do? Lot became covetous !! He chose himself the entire plain and went East. He was so eager to go East, choosing what was very pleasing to the eye. Aren't we all like Lot in many ways. Looking with our eyes? choosing the treasures this world offers?

But the other verses kind of shook me. After the two men parted ways, we see them starting afresh but they had different new beginnings. 

Abram lived in the land of Canaan, while Lot lived among the cities of the plain and pitched his tents near Sodom. Sodom????? Huh??? 

Take a look at verse 13. Now the people of Sodom were wicked and were sinning greatly against the Lord.

This  must have been common knowledge through out the entire land that Sodom was evil. Lot couldn't have possibly been unaware of that fact.

What was he thinking? what business would he possibly have had  to be pitching his tent near Sodom, a city whose bad reputation was laid bare for the whole world to see. 

As i write all this,  I am thinking, are we not a lot like Lot? choosing what looks appealing to the eye? compromising and making things look okay as long as they make us feel good??

These are some of my thoughts about Lot and more so that represent a lot of us.

He looked at the here and now ( the well watered plains......) don't we always do that? choosing what is comfortable, convenient for us at the moment?

He was very cunning (choosing entire plain!!!)... Greed has consumed our hearts. we want everything for us. If not everything, at least we want the best portion of all.

But what happened after Lot left?

I have no idea what Abraham felt after Lot went to possess the land. can't tell. the Lord though had better plans. Abraham looked like he had lost so much but he gained even more by his actions. He was blessed even more. 

The Lord said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, “Look around from where you are, to the north and south, to the east and west.  All the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring forever.  I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted. Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you.” 

God gave Abraham so much more than he expected. Even the land that Lot had picked for himself!!! 

The story doesn't end there. There were several consequences that accompanied Lot's choice, he later moved within the city, he was corrupted by the people of Sodom, their practices seemed normal to him( considering that he was willing to give his daughters to the guys who wanted to sleep with his male guests), He was captured by kings that waged war on Sodom (his family must have suffered), his wife died as they fled the destruction of Sodom, he was left to live in a cave, with nothing! his daughters had sexual intercourse with him because they were in a place with no dudes!!!  

What a not so happy ending!!!  NOT ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD

UCF Choir

Thinking about the UCF choir gets me all emotional. That is the one place in church ministry that i felt connected to so much yet the one place that i could not get involved into for a long time.

One thing that pulled me to the UCF Basketball court where I made my first declaration of Love for Jesus was the Music. The worship was beautiful; I could not just pass by. There is something Magnetic, wonderfully magnetic when it comes to Music for the Lord.... It just drew me. And i did accept the Lord. That was 16th November 2008.

Then I joined UCF. And I was amazed; listening to the Choir give praises and bring forth sweet music to the Lord. I knew I wanted to be a part of that ministry. But I took time. For some reasons, I wouldn't join the choir until this year in February when I decided, that it was the time for me to join.
At first, I thought that I couldn't be there, thought my sound would be horrible and scare everyone else off. But after I joined I realized that Jesus doesn't care if I think I am not Good enough. He equips those that He calls. And He uses weak vessels, so i did not need to be perfect to serve Him. He is perfect and I would be perfect in Him.
I also learned that Choir is not about Music alone. It is ministry, where lives are transformed, friendships are made, challenges are shared, fears are dealt with, and also a place to learn to love and to grow as Christ would want us to. Being in Choir is a great step in my life. It is wonderful.
This year we have had several activities.... Passion Nite at the start of this semester, Passion out reaches to a couple of places (a church in the suburbs of Kampala and a University off Entebbe Road). Making Christ's fame Known has been our main focus this year.

Passion nite

We had a Christmas production/ Passion nite it was totally amazing. We dressed in white. that was fun. and beautiful

Christmas production

Food was great

Love this bunch. Dennis, Diana and Robinah

Hamlet came along too.

group foto with friends in Choir

Milly, me, Rosette, and Robinah

Performing Kinyarwanda dance

10,000 reasons for my heart to Sing.

I have no idea what Matt Redman was thinking when he sat down to sing this song. But i am sure it must have been something very strong, very powerful.
Since yesterday i can't stop meditating on the words of this song. Bless the Lord Oh My Soul.......Worship His Holy Name, Sing like never Before Oh My soul. I worship your Holy Name.

I am amazed at how Matt was astounded at all the beauty around him, like the sun coming up bringing a new day and for that, a reason to sing a new a song to God again..... and trusting God for whatever may pass or whatever lies ahead but just praying that a new song will be sung when the evening comes.

10,000 reasons for my heart to find so that i could sing a new song!!! I know i have more than 10 thousand reasons for my heart to sing. He is amazing, loving and compassionate. he is slow to anger (not that i don't deserve the full weight of it), the beauty around me is breath taking, the gifts from Him are overwhelming; of Himself, of Life, My beautiful son, the people in my life..... i could go on and on (keeping in mind that it's not because i deserve them but they are freely given).

How i pray that each day i will find a reason out of the many in my heart, that my soul will sing a new song each day to Yahweh.

Oh Bless the Lord oh My Soul.

Today.....

Today being a Monday, I can only pray and hope for the best. As usual, I went to work this morning after dropping my boy at the school. I almost let him stay home and have a day off from school because he needed to rest. But after one call to his teacher, who told me that the class starts examinations today, I had to change plans. I had about 40 mins to get him ready for school which surprisingly  I managed to do. He was at school on time. Thanks to God for that, I wont have to be the mom that makes their kid miss exams because the kid is late for school. So far so good.

Boda ride to town was safe, and the traffic flow was not scary. After getting to town I managed to get onto a taxi  heading to Luboowa  (town where i work) that wasn't stopping on the way every 5 minutes, which means that I was at work on time. That is good as well. Everything is going well. Cassandra, came in with her mom and aunt (currently visiting) and I got to meet them. They helped around the office, (some of my workload reduced!!!)  which is really nice…… if Monday is not going well, then I must be really ungrateful.

Robert, the Boda guy who picks Hamlet for school did not forget to pick him today which is totally cool and he is home, fed and well…. Super cool!!! Still have a couple hours left in the office and I will head home. I am sure Monday is gonna end beautifully. Then I will tell of tomorrow….. TUESDAY. Another day. 

Learning That He is all that matters the most.

For a couple of weeks, it has been a great struggle understanding that He is all that matters.
This particular state of me being unaware of this fact has brought so much unrest and lack of contentment.
I have however learned that He is all that matters. What a difference that has made in my life so far.
My peace and Joy have swept in like a cool breeze. It is so refreshing, knowing that He is all that matters.

I am amazed at how simple and beautiful everything can change when God becomes the one thing that I crave for. It is a wonderful thing.

Jesus and the Cross; thoughts of a 4 year old.!!

The mind of my 4 year old. He never ceases to challenge me. 

So this morning while we were taking tea, i was telling my baby that he should never play with electric cables, plugs or any electric Gadgets. Then that is when the story started. I asked him if he knew what would happen to him once he got electrocuted, and he answered that he would die and get put on the cross. I told him that wasn't not true (I had to tell him what happens when one is dead; not my favorite conversation, but he wants the truth, nothing less)

Hamlet,the thinker

Then he said (out of the blue) “Mama, Jesus did bad things, that is why he was put on the cross!” it was not a question, it was a statement!!! I said , " no my dear. Jesus was put on the cross because people were too bad and Jesus had to die so that God could forgive their sins” ( in my mind I am thinking, I hope I did my best and he got it. ) may be he did because he then said, “so that they don't get burned… they were forgiven.” and our conversation on the topic just ended like that.

How I praise God for this wonderful gift; of beautiful conversations with my four year old who still has to grasp the essence of the Cross and yet is amazed by the story of the Cross.